This week the dreaded phrase was uttered over the boiled eggs. “Mummy! It’s World Book Day tomorrow.”
Now I know that World Book Day is very worthy and inspirational and proper. But I hate it with a vengeance. For every WBD, children must turn up at school as their favourite character from literature. Or author. Or book. It’s a nightmare. Clever mothers often opt for “My Life Story, by Me”, and simply opt out of dressing their child up entirely.
My children however insist that they MUST WEAR something properly appropriate. And it is a Parental Duty to oblige. Even if it takes all night to create. So far, we have had The Very Hungry Caterpillar (a green sleeping bag), Tomsk the Womble, The Little Princess, in which I cut my daughter’s hair SO short that one other mother called me ‘cruel’, Peter Rabbit (no incidents) the Artful Dodger (ditto) and Tom Kitten IN the roly poly pudding, in which I tied a child up so strongly in brown paper and string that she couldn’t sit down. All day.
I sent one as a Womble (eco warriors, remember) and the other as a Kindle. Seems right for 2012.